Divine Assistance
What could move a young boy to endure hardship and peril beyond the capacity of most men? It isn’t difficult to imagine his situation: he is cold and sleepy; it is nighttime; he knows his mother is worrying, and probably angry; his hand hurts; he is hungry (most of us would have been whining a long time ago!). But the boy remains steadfast.
It is helpful to examine what the boy knows about these dikes. Every child in his town would have known that even the smallest hole in the dike has the potential to grow to a large hole in a short time. And, they would feel with every fiber of their being the danger of a large hole in the dike — a devastating flood. It is only the dike that holds the angry sea back from their homes and families. Perhaps the boy pictured his family, sleeping soundly in their home, unsuspecting of the danger at hand. Or maybe he pictured his friends joyfully playing in the fields when suddenly a wall of water descends upon them. Whatever went through his mind, it must have been true knowledge of impending danger and love of others that motivated him.
But the question still remains, what would have given him the strength to stay awake, to push himself beyond his natural limits in order to save the city. As I said above, many grown men would have given in sooner.
Perseverance is the virtue which disposes a person to hold fast to a good purpose, keeping the end always in mind, despite even grave difficulties. This virtue takes time and effort to develop and perhaps this boy had acquired it in his short life. But, it seems more likely that he exercised the virtue with some divine assistance. Perhaps it was the gift of the Holy Spirit called fortitude that allowed him to remain firm in his good purpose, despite the dangers and discomforts.
The gift of fortitude is the divine assistance which moves us to live virtuously even in the face of temptation, danger, and any other manner of difficulty. It gives us a spiritual desire for virtuous deeds and ultimately for heaven. This gift corresponds to the fourth beatitude: Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after justice. (Mt. 5:6)
I am sure many parents feel like the boy with his finger in the dike when they must endure many difficulties to provide the best environment for their children: financial burdens; exhaustion brought on by lack of sleep and constant vigilance in protecting them from outside influences, etc. What is it that moves us to get up in the morning, to change another diaper, to hold our anger in check, to work so hard to form our children? It is the gift of fortitude given to us in Baptism! We must rely upon it and ask for it to be strengthened. And we need it when we are searching out the virtues (and vices) our children are seeing.
Who are our children's heroes?
“When I grow up, I want to be just like…”It is natural for children to have heroes. Often sports figures are the object of their admiration. One child may have a favorite baseball player. He knows the jersey number and the way he plays his position. He follows the team throughout the season and listens for news about his favorite player. Or, perhaps another child’s hero is a teacher, or older student whom she admires.
Whatever the case, it is natural for children to look up to another and emulate that person. A child’s hero can shape the way he acts, dresses, speaks, and even eats. For this reason, parents need to be aware of who their children admire, who are their heroes.
A hero is defined as someone whom we admire for his achievements or virtues. Society holds up certain achievements and virtues over others. We, as Christians, must evaluate what society says is successful and virtuous, and adjust our families lives to reflect the truth. For example, society sees financial security as the key sign of success. Yet as Christians, we know that money has nothing to do with what is really important in life. Even the poorest will reach the heights of heaven, and the richest man may end up at the bottom of the heap in the final analysis.
Give them a Saint
The most obvious heroes that our children are usually drawn to are sports figures or entertainers. While achievements of these heroes can motivate our children, their personal lives are often in direct conflict with our values. Our children need heroes that lead them to virtue, not vice.
The obvious answer to this dilemma is for the children to look to the saints as their heroes. However, they are not going to do that on their own, and getting them to turn towards these virtuous heroes is not necessarily a piece of cake.
One of the best ways to interest children in saints is to read about them as a family. Though regular attention to the feast days and various patrons in your home gives a nice broad appreciation of the saints, it is also important for children to get to know a few saints very closely. Choosing a biography to read aloud is a good way of fostering this. It may be best to focus your child on his or her patron, if they have a saint’s name. If not, you may want to choose one that you think suits your child’s interests or personality.
Another way of getting to know a saint well is to focus on one particular saint for a year. One family I know picks a saint’s name out of a hat each Church New Year’s Eve (the night before the first Sunday of Advent), and that is their patron for the year. Throughout the Church year, until the following Advent, they learn about the saint and ask for the saint’s prayers. They may purchase a picture or statue of the saint and make a small shrine in or outside of their home.
Whatever, route you take, it is important to look for literature and art that makes the saint real. Overly pious art and stories can make the saint seem remote and fictional. Saint’s struggled with sin just like we do…and they made mistakes, and they played, and they cried, and they laughed.
There are many children’s biographies on the market now (Ignatius Press, Tan), as well as collections such as Butler’s Lives of the Saints and The Saints and Our Children by Mary Reed Newland. You can even find some very good saint books in used bookstores. One of my favorites, suitable for reading to older children , is called The Heroes of God by Henri Daniel-Rops. This is a series of short stories about missionary saints, each filled with drama, action, adventure, and real people.
As we approach All Saint’s Day and the beginning of a new Church Year, I encourage you to evaluate your children’s heroes and see if you and your family can foster growth in virtue by learn to love and emulate the heroes given to us by the Church.
(Carol Kennedy is a Catholic writer with an MA in Theology and Catechesis from Franciscan University of Steubenville. She is the former DRE for the Spiritus Sanctus Academies in Ann Arbor, MI. Carol writes from Northern California where she lives with her husband and infant daughter. You can read more of her writings at www.carolscomments.com)
