Each of us has our own story. And conquering our fears is what God calls each of us to do. Because it is precisely in trusting that God’s love is greater than our fears that we are freed from the bondage of those fears.
I want to relate a message of hope to women caught in the fear of a crisis pregnancy. Hope that they do have a choice, that there are people ready to give them the support they need, and that by saying yes to the life God has willed to create — no matter how difficult the road may seem — they will be drawn closer to Christ and true happiness. I would like to share a story about my twin sister, Marsha, who one day found herself in a crisis pregnancy.
We were seniors in college when Marsha found out she was pregnant. Her boyfriend, Jim, wanted to keep the baby and get married, but my sister felt it would be a mistake to get married just because she was pregnant. And although abortion was legal, it was not an option for my sister because she knew that it was wrong. So she decided to place the baby for adoption.
Later that year Marsha gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. I helped her through the delivery, and was amazed at the miracle of childbirth. Years later I would realize what a gift from God witnessing that birth was to me since I did not get to watch the birth of my own son, who was born years later by emergency C-section. Marsha named her baby Margot, after me, and placed her with a Catholic family through Catholic Charities. When the time came to say goodbye, both my sister and my mom wrote the baby the most moving, beautiful letters one could imagine, and Marsha bought her a 14k gold necklace with a cross. She gave the letters and necklace to the adopting parents to give to her daughter when she was grown so that she would know she was loved.
Last April, some 26 years later, Marsha’s phone rang — and it was her daughter! The adopting parents had renamed her Susan. Like Marsha, Susan found the courage to overcome her fears and contact her birth mother. Never had she imagined the joy that awaited her! She would find not only her mother but her father as well, since eventually Marsha and Jim did marry. And not only her mother and father, but three full-blooded siblings — the brother and two sisters she always longed to have!
But now my sister was once again faced with the shame and fears of 26 years earlier because no one but myself and our parents knew of Susan. How would her children respond to a sister they never knew they had? How would they respond to her? But again, Marsha refused to bear those chains of fear and one more time she welcomed Susan into her life. That very weekend Susan came to visit Marsha and Jim. As she walked through their front door, with the 14K gold necklace and cross gleaming around her neck, she hugged Marsha and Jim and said to them, “Thank you for giving me life.”
Marsha’s other children were thrilled to learn of their older sister, and over the past months Susan and her family have been with Marsha and her family almost every weekend. Incredibly, Susan has grown up to be a special education school teacher just like Marsha! During a week of church camp the two families attended together over the summer, Susan’s adoptive mom took my sister aside and said, “At the time in your life when you couldn’t care for Susan, God gave her to us when we really needed her. Now, at this time in Susan’s life, when she really needs you and your family, we share her in love with you.”
This is the kind of sacrificial, self-giving love that God asks of each of us. By saying no to her fears and yes to God, Marsha has received an incredible gift of love and joy that she had never imagined possible. Young women like Marsha, who awake one day to find themselves in the maelstrom of a crisis pregnancy, need to learn the truth about abortion and receive the support they need to choose life for their child. The truth, of course, is that abortion destroys a new child God has created, a child who never existed before and will now exist for all eternity. It cheapens human dignity and leaves women physically, psychologically and emotionally damaged. It kills a holy innocent and deprives our world of an outpouring of love that only God can give.
By giving of ourselves in a sacrificial way, we draw close to Christ and truly learn the meaning of love.
© Copyright 2002 Catholic Exchange
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Margot Kyd is an executive at Sempra Energy in San Diego and serves on the board of directors of Catholic Exchange. You can email her at [email protected].
