Thom Kinkade and Nanette Willey fell in love at first sight, according to Nanette. The Willeys had just moved to Placerville, California, in the1960s and Thom was their paper boy. He was 13, Nanette was 12.
“The story of my friendship with Nanette in Placerville is really a dream vision of an innocent childhood romance,” writes Thom in The Many Loves of Marriage. “This was an era of our lives before sexual awareness. There was never any impropriety in our relationship — we didn’t even know what that was.” He goes on to say that the friendship, trust, communication, and mutual dreams they developed as youth helped them establish a strong marriage years later.
Thomas Kinkade is best known as the “Painter of Light” for his striking images of cottages with bright glowing windows, lighthouses with far-reaching beams or gardens illuminated by splashes of brilliant sunlight. More recently, he and Nanette have produced a couple of books with a wealth of practical wisdom for parents and families.
In the first, The Many Loves of Marriage (Multnomah, 2002), they articulate and identify some of the principles that have guided their marriage of 20 years and articulate the things they have done to preserve those principles. The second, The Many Loves of Parenting, was released this year.
Read Randall Murphree’s Review of The Many Loves of Parenting
Cultivating common dreams is one thing they emphasize. “Dreams are like a fire in your fireplace,” writes Thomas. “You can’t leave the house, run a dozen errands, and expect the fire to keep burning merrily on its own. A fire must be tended. It’s the same with dreams.”
In a chapter entitled “An Enduring Love,” Thomas says, “What stays the same in a marriage? God stays the same …. Your vows stay the same.” He says wedding vows are a fixed rock in a world that “reinvents itself with every passing hour.” He calls those vows the changeless mountains in the painting of our lives.
He admits that even he and Nanette have to work at an enduring love. “Practice the act,” he says, “and the inspiration comes. Practice the act, and romance returns.”
Nanette writes, “Married life truly is a mosaic of little things. Little touches. Little words. Little smiles of encouragement. Little expressions of endearment.” She shares some of the little ways she and Thomas encourage each other. “He’s so appreciative and takes every opportunity to give me honor and praise,” she writes. “I don’t ever want to take that for granted.”
Thomas admits that as a young, unknown, penniless artist he was racked with resentment. “I was coming short of God’s grace and kindness through my impatience and anger,” he writes, “and found myself in danger of becoming a bitter young man.” During that season of his life, Nanette was the encourager who quietly motivated him to continue pursuing their dream.
One chapter, “A Spontaneous Love,” advocates a family life lived — as far as is possible — without current media influences. The Kinkades have no commercial TV in their home, and they subscribe to no newspapers and magazines. While their four daughters don’t always appreciate that reality, they do recognize that this allows them time to be a family, doing simple things together — reading a book together, walking into town as a family, spending time at the park, playing board games, just talking.
He says their daughters’ friends gravitate toward the Kinkade home because they can sense the love and stability of the family. “God gave us a home as a small retreat against the storms and hurts of life on a fallen planet,” he writes. “This identity of home should be central to who we are as Christians, and I do not take it lightly.”
The Kinkades try to overcome our culture’s pervasive materialistic attitudes by teaching their daughters the value of experience over possessions. “Given the choice between experience or a possession, I’ll take the experience every time,” he writes. “After all, possessions come and go. Possessions lose their luster and wear out. But an experience lasts for a lifetime, gaining radiance and joy with each retelling.”
(This article courtesy of Agape Press).
