We are almost at the one year mark since our contracting business took a nose dive…right into that pool with the rest of the contractors that have also been unable to avoid the sweep caused by this financial meltdown we are experiencing. Tough times.
Our particular business began the year we married — 1977 — not necessarily by choice. My husband was working for someone and could no longer handle the personality differences and left that job. So there we were. Married all of one month and we were off to the yet unknown world of the self-employed. Mind you, his new bride had known nothing but “white collar”, “salaried” work in her life experience to that point. None-the-less, we were undaunted.
I have probably learned more from being a hands-on business owner in construction than all other life experiences combined. I’ve learned you do not do vacation during the “season” — which is vaguely identified as somewhere between the ground-is-too-frozen-to-dig season and the ground-is-to-saturated-to-dig season. I’ve learned that sometimes people are less than honest in their business dealings. We’ve learned that too often it is who you know, not the work you do that will get you the work. We’ve learned that those who claim to “represent” our interests really only look after their own.
In this past year we have had more “down time” than we have ever experienced. The first few months were expressed in panic. I read a quote by Corrie Ten Boom and jotted it down on a small piece of paper that still sits on my kitchen windowsill: “There is no panic in heaven, only plans.” But, as time went on, we found that my husband, an ordained Deacon in the Catholic Church now had more time for ministry. He is, I believe, a blessing to our Parish.
But then, there is the financial burden all of this lack of work has created — something we hadn’t experienced this severely since we were newlyweds. Though I also work full time outside our home and business as the Director of a non-profit — it is also for very little pay and no benefits. We have had more than one discussion, as I have with my Board of Directors, about the possibility of leaving that position to find something in the private sector with better pay. We prayed, they prayed and we really felt God was saying…stay. Trust. While we are doing our best to uncover all the work we possibly can — it continues to be painfully slow. One day at a time.
That got me to thinking — about manna from heaven. When God fed the Israelites in the desert, he did it one day at a time. They could not hoard it because it would dissolve with the day’s heat. They had to trust each morning that there would indeed be manna for another day. And the biggie? The people of Israel complained and were “….tired of this manna….”. Gulp. Maybe God is just as weary of hearing our complaining. Undoubtedly.
Do we not serve this same God today? Yes. Are his mercies not new everyday as well? Thankfully, yes. We are learning all over again that this God can be trusted and each day, we are growing stronger in the understanding of the great care only He can provide.
I needed that reminder. Maybe today you do as well.