Rebecca Thatcher and Mike Kelley, staff writers for the American Statesman, reported that law enforcement officials were “stunned and puzzled” at the fugitive’s decision to turn himself in. “I’ve been in this business a very, very long time,” Carter said, “and am struggling to answer [why he voluntarily turned himself in] myself.”
More than a year after the conclusion of that case, his reason for doing so demands a closer look. During the manhunt, Resendez-Ramirez took refuge at his brother’s house in Mexico, and from there was in contact with his sister, Manuela Resendez. The family was concerned about Resendez-Ramirez’s safety, fearing he would be shot either by a bounty hunter or the police. Eventually they were able to convince their brother to surrender, and contacted Sergeant Carter to work out the details.
Mother Teresa often said, “Love begins at home.” Ideally, the family is a community of love; the home a safe harbor where we are individually nurtured, valued and loved. All too often, however, our home lives fall far short of that ideal.
Many families have become so busy with activities and work commitments that they hardly have any time to enjoy each other. What starts out as a righteous effort to enhance our family life and provide for the temporal needs of our children ends up taking hold of us, blinding us to truth and derailing us from our most important objective — staying fixed on the path to holiness.
In the end, we will all be judged by how we responded to Jesus’ words: “When I was hungry you gave me to eat. When I was naked you clothed me. When I was homeless you took me in…” But we needn’t look outward to find Our Lord in disguise. Our own children come to us hungry, naked and homeless, and we have the privilege of serving Jesus by loving and caring for them first.
Before my son came along, I spent my time pretty much as I wanted. My world revolved wholly and completely around me. Then all of a sudden I was responsible for an endless cycle of feedings, diaper changes and rocking the baby to sleep, and I hadn’t a minute’s rest. I realized that in order to be the best mother I could, I had to serve my child with joy and an attitude of generous giving. I also realized I had much to learn. I loved my child, yet my love needed to grow in perfection, as it still does today. The goal of the Christian life is learning to love more perfectly, and within the family, we have the perfect environment in which to grow and perfect our love.
Now that my children are a bit older, the hunger, nakedness and homelessness they experience are not physical but emotional. They hunger not just for food but for understanding, love and forgiveness. They are not naked physically anymore, but are in constant need of respect and affirmation. They don’t just need physical shelter these days, but a home in which the light shines from within, a safe place away from the pressures of school and social life — a place of refuge. The measure to which we fulfill these needs in our children is the measure of our success as parents and followers of Christ.
In working tirelessly to overcome our shortcomings, we become aware of the difficulties inherent in following Jesus’ teachings. We share what we learn with our children. As we struggle along the path to holiness we become much more effective teachers of our children because we begin teaching by example. Our children not only benefit by receiving the life-giving power of our love directly, but by seeing the love inherent in our struggle. In this they learn to love with greater perfection themselves. Discipline becomes discipleship.
Growing in holiness is a fierce battle against self, but the payoff — for us, our children, our Church and our world — is immeasurably bigger than all our individual efforts combined. It is the fulfillment of the great prayer of petition, “Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in Heaven.”
Though the rest of the world saw Rafael Resendez-Ramirez as a brutal murderer and the refuse of society, to his family he remained a beloved brother. The family knew their brother had done horrible things and deserved punishment, yet their bond of kinship inspired loving treatment, forgiveness and a peaceful end to a highly charged manhunt. Such is love in action. Not perfect, not pretty, but with a sweetness and beauty all its own.
