"Ideals are dead."
The conversation at the table had flown from the wedding feast at Cana, and the "fact" that it was Jesus' own wedding that was taking place, to the "fact" that Jesus never intended to start a church, to the college degree of our friend, Ken.
Ken, an advanced agnostic-skeptic who had just been diagnosed with cancer, informed his listeners, a collection of family and friends, that he had once majored in theology; and that, in fact, theology was his undergraduate degree from Loyola University; we were shocked.
"But you're a computer programmer, aren't you?" Mike asked. "How'dju ever get from theology to that?"
"Data processing, actually. Well, I found out ideals are dead. People mess up the world and nobody's perfect," Ken said, chewing his steak, as if that explained his statement. "Computers are what I understand. But I am the most ethical computer person in the field," Ken joked. We laughed.
I wondered if he had taken any philosophy with his theology.
"What do you mean, ideals are dead?" I asked Ken.
"I mean, that ideals are impossible, and that no one even tries, and so they're dead; no one is idealistic anymore," Ken stated, holding his hands up, and shrugging his shoulders
"What are ideals? I mean, what do you think they are?" I asked. Mike, Fran and the rest of the folks sat back, waiting to see how the conversation would unfold.
"Oh, you know," Ken said, "like perfection, beauty, truth. No one really knows what they are, so how can people live as if they are trying to reach those ideals?" he said.
"Do you try, as you said earlier, to be ethical at work?" I asked, finishing my pasta.
"Oh yes, I think I'm probably the most trustworthy employee my boss has," Ken laughed, "in fact, I am the most trustworthy," he pointed his thumbs at his chest.
"Wouldn't it be nice if all the other programmers, or processors or whatever, were as ethical as you?" I asked.
"Oh God!" Ken threw his head back, laughing. "It'd be a completely different company! That's just what I mean, no one is ethical anymore!" he called the waitress for another glass of beer.
"But you are ethical, right?" I said, sipping my wine and grabbing a piece of bread.
"Oh yes, sure. It's ingrained in me. My Catholic upbringing, you know! If I was unethical, I'd feel guilty so fast," he dashed his hand across his chest and snapped his fingers, "I'd almost wish I was still Catholic so I could go to confession!" he laughed and I saw the gold fillings in his teeth. Everyone else was laughing, too, and we were served our coffee and desserts.
"But," I said, "somehow, you still think it is important to be ethical, right?" I asked, pouring cream into my steaming hot java.
"Sure, why not?" Ken laughed again and patted his round belly, pushing up his glasses.
"Well, wouldn't you agree, then, that you still hold that the ideal of being ethical is important, at least to you?" I asked, my fork poised in my hand, ready to take a bite out of my tira misu.
"I sup-pose," Ken said slowly, and scratched behind his ear. "Yeah, I mean, for me, I guess you're right, maybe," he said.
"And maybe you'd want your cancer doctor to be ethical, too, right?" I asked.
"Well, sure, yes — I mean, he'd better be!" Ken shifted uncomfortably in his chair.
"Then ideals live!" I cried. "Let's drink to that!"
I raised my glass of merlot, and we all clinked our glasses together around the table, laughing and calling out 'Ideals live!' and 'Long live ideals!'
After a few more sips of beer, Ken reached across the table and shook my hand.
"Thanks," he said, quietly.
"For what?"
"For showing me that. It gives me hope."
"No problem," I said, as I got on my coat and left; I walked down by the lake and watched the stars reflect their light in the water, which shimmered in the night like magic. I stared at the perfection of beauty in front of me. Yes, ideals live. I couldn't go on if they didn't.
I saw that the mountains surrounding the lake were shimmering in the starlight, and suddenly, I was overcome.
"Ideals live!" I shouted to the steadfast mountains, "Ideals are alive!"
"Alive! Alive! Alive" echoed the awakened mountains.
Ideals are alive, and all's right with the world, I thought. Life is good.
