For Parties at Home
* Enlist the help of a few friends or relatives. It is very hard to play hostess, organize games, deal with the food and gifts, and keep yourself from having a nervous breakdown. And don't be afraid to ask for help with the cleanup too. But remember you will owe them big-time!
*Plan for one or two activities or games such as a piñata and a simple craft, or dancing. Keep these short and sweet, or the kids will just lose interest anyway. Then just let the kids just run around and play. If you try to micromanage the party, you will be exhausted and the kids will be bored. Allow them to spend the bulk of the time talking, playing, and goofing around together.
*Keep the numbers manageable. You don't need to invite twenty children to have a fun party. As difficult as it is to choose guests, have your child select ten or twelve friends. Then if they would like to involve their entire class, they can bring cupcakes to school to celebrate.
Jodie Lynn is a nationally syndicated family columnist, author and parent
educator. Her latest book, “Mommy CEO (Constantly Evaluating Others) 5 Golden Rules,” (Revised Edition) is now available from any bookstore or online. Mommy-CEO products – for the real CEO – are finally here: caps, T-shirts, mugs, boxer shorts, etc., See www.ParentToParent.com for more details.
Ask me when I am really stressed out and I'm apt to tell you that it's April. It's not so much the impending Spring Fever – end of school play rehearsals, field trips, teacher appreciation week, yard work, closets to clean out, etc., — as it is the fact that I have two daughters with birthdays that same month. That's double the planning and the headaches!
But as I talk with other parents, it's nice to know that I'm not alone. Many of us are in the same boat and are paddling towards the “wrap-the-presents-and-bake-the-cake” shore! Actually, wrapping presents and making arrangements for a cake is the simple part. However, take heart! Over the years I've come up with a few workable solutions for birthday stress and mess to help keep my sanity intact. Hopefully they will help you too.
General Planning Tips
* If the birthday boy/girl can write — let him or her help with the invitations. Begin this activity three weeks early to ensure they are done in time to be sent out. Use a pencil to erase mistakes without frustration, and proceed slowly. Address invitations in sets of three. This will ensure that no famous last words like “Mom – my fingers are getting cramped!” “I can't finish!” or “Oops, gotta run, my favorite afternoon cartoon show is on the TV” will be heard often.
* Always send out invitations two weeks before the birthday party. It's perfectly fine to use address labels in the return corner of the envelope. Let the kids help with these and the stamps.
* Call guests within one week to see who can come. Nope, I'm not kidding. In today's busy society, if you don't call many parents won't remember to RSVP. For those who can't come, send out an invitation to someone new that very same day. This will still be within the normal range of courtesy, and you can fill those holes you've probably already paid for at the birthday spot. If you haven't heard from the new guests within three days, give them a call.
* Don't buy presents for your child too early. You don't want to overwhelm him or her with gifts or they won't seem special. Have your child make up a birthday wish list. Take the time to thoroughly explain the part regarding “wish” so they understand that every gift might not appear! Have them number the gifts in the order of “I want this the most” categories. Get your child the most desired gift (if it is reasonable!) and you can also give other guests suggestions for things your child would really like.
* Depending on the age of your child — you might give them an option to choose flavor of the cake, wrapping paper colors, themes, party favors, etc. Just preface your statements with: “I'm not promising I'll be able to get the _______ theme, but I'll try my best.” This will make sure they don't think you have said the word “promised.” This will keep your child's expectations in check.
* If the children are young instead of a cake, consider opting for cupcakes. They make less of a mess, and the size is usually just right for almost all ages. Bring extra napkins to wrap around the cup cakes to help with messy hands and crumbs.
For Parties Away from Home
* Decide as much as two months in advance on the location of the party. During the mad rush of the holiday season many “party rooms” will already be booked if you are having the party at a kids activity place like Discovery Zone or even a pizza place.
* Send in your deposit early. To discourage the company from overbooking (which happened to us), call and ask one question every two weeks. It could be about the price of each guest, party favors, drinks, decorations, etc., This will help them to remember who you are, and to know you are on your toes.
* Take your own trash bags to the birthday party place. This will allow you to have adequate bags to come back home with the things you want to be kept clean and separated: gifts, pieces to gifts, money, cards, etc.
