The boy on my son’s 7th grade basketball team was nearly in tears. How could he have such a long face? I wondered. Their team just won the game!
But, as Peter and I drove home that day, I learned that the issue was “playing time.” The boy had been a bench warmer and he was wrapped up in feeling that he deserved to be in the game. He was envious of the “star” player. Meanwhile, in the audience, parents had been saying, “That boy’s a ball hog.”
But those other parents weren’t the only ones with resentments. I had to admit that I too had been caught up in feelings that weren’t supportive of a “team spirit.” I had been wishing my son would have a larger share of ball handling opportunities. I was guilty too.
The issue of “envy versus community” is important for us to consider during this Lenten season. Envy is one of the Seven Deadly Sins because it tears down what is good. Even when the feelings stay inside our minds and aren’t acted out, envy smolders.
Resentments keep us from building the Body of Christ.
Envy makes leaders hold back. No one wants to take a position in the spotlight if the people all around think THEY should have the glory. It comes back to the reality that we all want the glory and the glitter…as long as we don’t have to work for it!
But envy has been around since the beginning of time. Cain envied Abel. So he killed him! Joseph was sold into slavery because of envy. And the Prodigal Son’s older brother envied the mercy his father extended to the straying member of their family.
Thomas Aquinas described envy as, “Sorrow over another person’s good fortune.”
That brings me back to the basketball team. To be on a team means to work together. All are important, but all have different roles. When each member is doing what they are called to do, as designated by the coach, then the team is united. The team acts as one body.
What if our Church was truly a team? What if we divided each person’s sorrow? The pain would be less intense. And if we multiplied each other’s good fortune, then we would always have something to celebrate. We would encourage each other and help bring out the best.
If we were a team for God, then our potential leaders wouldn’t feel they had to hide their light under a bushel basket! There would be more vocations and more converts.
As I reflect on this, it seems as if the first step in countering envy is to focus on being deeply thankful for the blessings we have. It’s hard to be jealous about the neighbor’s new truck, when I’m focused on the wonders in my own life!
St. Paul advises us to use this attitude of gratitude in our prayer life. In his letter to the Philippians he says we should give thanks before anything else. We present thanksgiving with our concerns because that shows trust in God. And when we do this we will be blessed with great peace.
When we feel grateful for the gifts we have, we can be more magnanimous with others. Our hearts overflow with knowledge of God’s generosity that is given abundantly according to each person’s unique needs.
At my daughter’s school Science Fair, one girl won several prizes. Lots of parents were in the audience and we all wanted our children to be winners. Standing in the back were two women. One of them leaned over and said in a loud whisper, “Why is that girl getting all the prizes? It isn’t fair to the rest of them.”
The other woman, a member of our parish, answered quickly. She said, “She’s winning because she’s good, practicing Catholic! God has blessed her!”
Let’s cheer for each other this Lent! Then we’ll feel stronger. We’ll be a team for Jesus.
