This is how you are to pray . . . Thy will be done . . . (Mt. 6:9)
One year in February, a warm front pushed in through our area. Sunny skies and mild temperatures afforded us lots of time spent outdoors, enjoying a taste of spring. In fact, I had convinced myself that spring had indeed come early to our Northern region. Ahhh. It felt so good to be done with winter.
Then came March, the month that officially ushers in the season of spring. Guess what came back to our neck of the woods with a vengeance? Snow, wind, and cloudy skies. In fact, it all started with an ice storm the likes of which I had never seen. My entire yard was one giant hockey rink. The kids had the week off from school, so they grabbed their helmets and their sleds and had a blast. I, however, did not dare leave the house for fear of slipping on the ice and breaking a much-needed body part. So instead, I looked out the window, and just like the Grinch who stole Christmas, I complained.
Now it is true, some of us are just a little more thin-blooded than others; for us, the cold really does seem to reach a little more to the core. But the thing about complaint is that it tends to make our hearts “two sizes too small.” When we complain, it takes away our ability to see. To see what precisely? The hand of God in our circumstances.
I called a friend to let her know what I thought of this weather, and you know what her response was?
“I think it’s pretty.”
Pretty?? What part of cold and cloudy in March is pretty? Well, if I had taken off my complaint glasses and put on her glasses of gratitude, I might have seen for myself.
From the heavens the rain and snow come down and do not return there till they have watered the earth, making it fertile and fruitful, giving seed to the one who sows and bread to the one who eats . . . (Is. 55:10)
When the Lord sends us “rain and snow” (or anything else we find unpleasant), his intention is to make us “fertile and fruitful.” When we accept whatever he sends with gratitude, we become like “the one who sows” and “the one who eats.” In other words, God will send us his gifts, but they will do nothing for us unless we receive them with a thankful heart.
My kids could have joined me on the couch lamenting, “I wish the sun would come back out so we could go outside and not just sit here.” But then, they would never have created the unprecedented memory of launching down the most fantastic ice hill they’d ever sled. It was the thrill of a lifetime for them, one they will always remember with glee. I, on the other hand, will not particularly take note of the couch upon which I sat.
So, right then and there, I began to pray, “I’m sorry for complaining, Lord,” and “Thank you for the cold and snow.” And the result was immediate: right away I was given to understand the “seed” and “bread” that God had given me. If it had been warm and sunny that week as it had been the week before, there is no way I would have “wasted” my days inside. I would have certainly taken the kids to the playground, gone on lots of walks, enjoyed the fresh air . . . and the indoor tasks I had needed to fulfill would have fallen by the wayside. Perhaps that doesn’t sound like much to be grateful for, but in that time of prayer alone with the Lord, my eyes were opened to see it as a giant gift. What’s more, I did not have to go outside. I could look out the window to watch the kids have fun from the comfort of a warm blanket, a crackling fire, and a steaming cup of coffee. God let me borrow the gratitude glasses my friend had been wearing, and now I could see just what she found so “pretty” about the cold.
Now it is one thing to refrain from complaining about adverse weather, but the truth is, there are some circumstances in life that are far more difficult to accept: the loss of a loved one, the diagnosis of a serious illness, a global pandemic. The Lord knows we are not impervious to pain; our hearts are not made of stone, but flesh, and so acceptance does not always come immediately for us.
On the days that it does not, the Lord is patient, kind, and merciful. He understands. He can wait. And He will not allow His grace to “return to [him] void, but shall do [his] will, achieving the end for which [he] sent it” (Is. 55:11). His word shall not return to Him until we, who sincerely desire to accept His will but just can’t right now, finally do come to accept it. But what does that mean? It simply means that during the times in which we are struggling—that is, the “middle part” of our trial—it is then that Jesus carries us through.
The LORD is close to the brokenhearted; and those who are crushed in spirit he saves. (Ps. 34:19)
Once we have accepted our trial, the grace we receive is the gift of peace in all things. His grace remains, taking over our hearts as a reward for our struggle to practice the virtue of gratitude in the darkness when we could not see. We persevere in offering again and again a “sacrifice of praise,” and in exchange, the Lord sees to it that our praise no longer feels like “sacrifice” at all, but rather, as genuine and natural to us as breathing. The grace that remains is that we are truly peaceful and full of joy, even though the trial itself may not yet have come to an end.
Accepting our circumstances as from the hand of God—whether by way of His ordained will or His permissive will—does not mean that we won’t experience sorrow in them, and so we should not expect that. Sorrow too is a gift from God that breaks open our hearts in a capacity to love like nothing else. What acceptance does for us is to allow the peace of Christ to come ushering in, such that it might coexist right alongside our sorrow. Without that peace, our trials become unbearable. But with it, that which we must endure becomes bittersweet. Bitter because it still causes us pain, but also sweet, because we now see the good that God has drawn out of our trial. So much so, that we can honestly say we would not change our circumstances if we could. Then God has already changed our hearts.
Author’s Note: Excerpt from The Safe Haven: Scriptural Reflections for the Heart and Home (Liturgical Season of Lent). To purchase, visit Amazon or The Catholic Company, where all other volumes currently in print are also available.
Photo by Denys Nevozhai on Unsplash
