I have been taken aback in recent years by the way Catholics behave in church at the end of Mass. I have seen it in more than one parish: As soon as the priest leaves the sanctuary, the congregation takes on the appearance of a social gathering, something similar to a parish picnic or crafts fair.
I am not exaggerating. People call to each other from fifty feet away, laugh and slap each other on the back. Even older Catholics, people who had been bent solemnly in prayer just seconds before, join in the merrymaking, as if the presence of the Blessed Sacrament made not the slightest bit of difference to them. And it is not only the parishioners. Once the priests remove their vestments, they come from the sacristy and join in the clusters of people gathered around the altar, joking and talking about sporting events.
At first I thought it might be just me; that maybe I was getting old and grouchy and imagining things to be different from what they were years ago. But I don’t think so. I can remember the jovial spirit that was part of the Sunday morning atmosphere after Mass, but it always took place in the vestibule or on the steps outside the church. People would no more laugh uproariously in the nave of the church than light up a cigarette there.
I also thought for a while that this behavior might be unique to the area where I live. But I discovered that is not the case. I have seen this same thing in churches in places where I travel, Georgia, the Carolinas, Colorado, Nevada. Moreover, I have seen letters to the editor in several Catholic publications making the same point. The letter-writers complain that they have a hard time praying after Mass because of the party-like atmosphere that descends upon the church.
So, what is going on? Obviously, a change in attitude about what is proper behavior in church has occurred among ordinary Catholics. And let me stress that I am not talking about young people or those who might not know better, people, for example, who do not attend church on a regular basis. The change in demeanor I have noticed can be seen in pious, older churchgoers, practicing Catholics who are properly reverent during the Mass itself, men and women who would have stayed solemn inside church a decade or so back.
I hope no one misreads what I am about to say. I don’t want to make excuses for this change. I suspect that those who argue it is an indication of a loss reverence, even a diminished belief in the Real Presence, are on to something. But, then again, maybe it is not all that bad. Let’s try to keep things in perspective. I think I have a clue to what is happening.
First of all, let us not forget that there always have been occasions when it was considered proper to talk and chatter and joke around as if the presence of the Blessed Sacrament did not make that much difference. I’m serious. We all have done it. There are times when we all behave differently in church than when we are involved in formal prayer. Right? Custodians buffing the floors; Altar and Rosary Society members arranging flowers; ushers; choirs at practice; wedding parties rehearsing for the big day; pastors with roofers looking for a ceiling leak; Holy Name Society members constructing the Christmas manger scene — all behave before the Blessed Sacrament in a manner not much different from the way they would in the parish cafeteria. Oh, they may genuflect as they come and go and keep their voices a bit low, but I would say that they are about as loud as the chatty people after Mass that we are considering.
But is this a fair comparison? In some ways, no. The people working or rehearsing in church have no choice but to act as they do. One would not expect the Blessed Sacrament to be removed every time there is choir practice. The people chatting after Mass, on the other hand, could easily wait a minute or two before initiating all the socializing. Still, we cannot ignore the fact that most of the people we see hobnobbing after Mass were praying silently and reverently just seconds before they start to chuckle and hug the grandkids. I am confident they would be offended if anyone suggested that they are displaying irreverence toward the Blessed Sacrament.
How do I know that? Well, here goes. I have a confession to make. A few months ago I found myself as chatty as the people I have been criticizing. I was attending a wedding in Brooklyn. I had arrived about a half hour before Mass and was sitting alone in the last row of the church, praying and admiring the architecture of the older building. They called Brooklyn the “borough of churches” when I was a boy. It is an apt term. There are churches there that take your breath away, structures put up in the first half of the last century through the donations of working class New Yorkers that no one would dare to undertake nowadays because of the cost. I still can’t figure out the economics of it all.
Anyway, some of my relatives whom I hadn’t seen in a few years began to arrive shortly after me. A few of them came with young children. They sat next to me. And we might as well have been on a beach or at a ball park. I started to laugh and engage in small talk and make faces at the little children. Even when it finally dawned on me that I doing the same thing that I was critical of in others, I was reluctant to revert to a more prayerful demeanor. I toned down my behavior a bit, but not that much. I did not give anyone the silent treatment. I would have felt that I was acting “stuffy” if I did not respond jovially to the friendly overtures from the people around me. More to the point: The small talk just did not seem all that improper to me, whereas it would have if it were going on in the middle of the Mass. I assure you, my behavior was not a sign of disrespect for the Blessed Sacrament. Certainly, I did not intend it that way.
I think this experience gave me a clue to the change in attitude among ordinary Catholics about proper behavior before the Blessed Sacrament. I suspect that what serious-minded Catholics are doing when they socialize after Mass is no different — in their minds — from what the pious Catholic plumber does when he yells to his helper to get the right wrench when he is working on the heating ducts behind the altar, or the Altar and Rosary Society member does when she calls across the altar to suggest where the flowers should be placed for Mass. They are adjusting their behavior to time and place.
In other words, I suspect that they have come to the conclusion that Our Lord does not mind if those who have just worshipped Him reverently in prayer at Mass express their love for one another in a warm and cordial manner as they leave the church; that there is no great need for them to wait until they cross the threshold of the vestibule to drop the demeanor we associate with prayer.
But the question remains: Does the new after-Mass conviviality do harm to our spiritual lives and that of our fellow parishioners? Is the warmth of the pew-side conversation we see these days a sign of a vital Christian community? Or an indication of a diminished belief in the Real Presence? If it is the latter, we better hold the small talk for the church parking lot, even if someone finds us “stuffy” when we do so.
James Fitzpatrick's new novel, The Dead Sea Conspiracy: Teilhard de Chardin and the New American Church, is available from our online store. You can email Mr. Fitzpatrick at fitzpatrijames@sbcglobal.net.
(This article originally appeared in The Wanderer and is reprinted with permission. To subscribe call 651-224-5733.)
