Did you see the newspaper story about sheriffs and police chiefs across the country frustrated in their attempts to gain security clearance from the FBI? They spoke of stacks of paperwork, months of waiting time and intrusive, unecessary questions. They think that’s bad? They should have their wives try and make a service appointment with our region’s natural gas company.
Two years ago when we moved into this house, I called the company and had the gas service switched on and set up our account. Like most women whose husbands are engrossed in a new job, I set up accounts for the phone, cable modem, satellite TV, electricity, and dog kennel.
Last week I called to get an estimate on running a gas line to my new stove. “We can’t talk to you Mrs. Rinehart. Your husband will have to call. Only his name appears in our records.” Did I ask to have the gas disconnected? Change our phone number, address or waist measurements? No. I’m trying to give them my money and they won’t talk to me. Me — the person who set up the account from this same phone.
Every Bus Stop Mommy knows who it’ll be sitting at home on a weekday between the 8AM and 6PM, waiting for the serviceman to appear. We also know who’s ultimately going to make the financial decision to pay for a new gas line and cooktop. Hint: Who wants to replace the electric cooktop with a gas model because she’s the one who does the majority of the cooking and if she’s not happy in the kitchen no one in the rest of the house is happy?
And yet they won’t talk to me. The person who opened the account and pays the bills off a bank account with her name on it.
God forbid there’s an emergency.
“Hello gas company? I’m worried and I need your help. I smell gas fumes near my furnace and hot water heater.”
“Yes Ma'am, sounds like a leak and calls for an emergency visit. What’s your name?”
“Betty Homemaker.”
“And your address Mrs. Homemaker?”
“123 Busy Street.”
“Oh, we’re sorry. Your name is not on the account. Because of our privacy policy, we can only talk to the person whose name is on the account. Your husband will have to call.”
“He’s out of the country on business.”
“I’m sorry, because of our privacy issue, only the person whose name on the account can request service.”
Let’s review. I can open an account over the phone.
I can sign a check to pay the bill on this account.
But I can’t request an estimate on running a new gas line so I can give them more money. Hmmm.
Maybe my electric stove top isn’t so bad after all.
Karen Rinehart is a syndicated newspaper columnist, public speaker, and creator of The Bus Stop Mommies™. Her book, Invisible Underwear, Bus Stop Mommies and Other Things True To Life, is a popular read in book clubs, school pick up lines, and soccer fields. She enjoys hearing from readers across the States and as far away as Australia, Japan, and England. You can read more at BusStopMommies.com. Karen lives in North Carolina with her two kids, two dogs, and one husband, where they attend St. James Catholic Church. (Well, they leave the dogs at home.)
