Dear Catholic Exchange:
I know you send your Words of Encouragement to a lot of people, and probably get a lot of responses back, so I have refrained from cluttering up your mail box with another encouragement to “keep up the good work.” But I just had to respond to this one.
When you talked in this edition (“Pledge of the Glory to Come!”) about the similarity between the Eucharistic banquet and the heavenly banquet, and how, when we get to heaven we will feel like we are finally home, because that is what we are looking for here: I was reminded of the first time I stood at the altar after my ordination. I was “reduced to tears” (then and now) because I caught myself feeling and thinking “finally, I'm home – right here at the altar – I'm home!!!”
As a priest, being at the altar is “home” to me. When I was younger, and looked forward instead to a wife and children (I'm not complaining about celibacy!), I imagined the exact same emotion of “I'm home!” with a family as I now feel at the altar. Thank you for reminding me – again – of why I became a priest.
God bless you, abundantly and evermore.
Rev. Frank E. Jindra
Pastor:
St. Mary's Church, Spencer, NE
Assumption Church, Lynch, NE
A Liturgically Correct Wardrobe
Dear Catholic Exchange:
I enjoyed the article on the colors that Mother Church uses in her liturgy. [“The Color of Vestments.”] Two years ago, I adopted a wardrobe which consists of dresses which match the liturgical colors – not vestments, mind you; only the priest can wear them, and then only at Liturgy! No, this wardrobe consists of clothing proper to the laity which is in the colors of the Church year.
Every day I check a Church calendar for the color of the day, and I put on the dress in the corresponding color! Though this is certainly not mandatory for any Catholic, I find that it's a great way to keep ones mind on the liturgical cycle and the feasts of the saints. When I wear red for a martyr's feast, for instance, it really makes me think about how the saint shed his or her blood for Christ – every time I look at my dress!
I cannot claim to have originated this idea, however. That honor belongs to a Mrs. Regina Schmedicke. Here are two articles about it online which she authored or co-authored:
Thanks again for the article! God be with you.
In Jesu et Maria,
Rosemarie
Clarifications on NFP
Dear Catholic Exchange:
I would like to make some comments regarding Eric Scheske's article entitled “To Control or Not Control? Coming Around on NFP.”
I believe some of the comments Mr. Scheske made can be misunderstood by someone not familiar with NFP. My husband and I were recently certified as a Teaching Couple of NFP by the Couple to Couple League and I feel that I have a certain responsibility to respond to some of his comments.
Mr. Scheske states that “Natural Family Planning didn't fit with these plans, especially given my wife's biological conditions.” While the author did not go into detail about his wife's conditions, NFP can be practiced effectively even if a woman has irregular cycles. The NFP classes also offer some suggestions for making cycles more regular.
Mr. Scheske states that they did not choose to use NFP. In fact, they chose no method of family planning. The author states that he and his wife did not even have a heart-to-heart talk about their method of family planning, he just could not find any condoms on their honeymoon night. One of the best benefits of NFP is that it improves communication between husbands and wives. They must talk to each other and make decisions together about their family. A husband learns to respect his wife and her fertility and the way God designed her. They rediscover courtship and when a period of abstinence is over, there is a period of honeymoon.
Mr. Scheske states that NFP is hard, relatively uncertain (room for human error), and that it involves surprises (children). NFP is easy to learn. In the NFP classes, couples learn enough the first class to start using NFP right away. The only method of family planning that one can be 100% certain that pregnancy will not occur is total abstinence or removal of the ovaries or removal of the testicles. All other methods of family planning, including NFP, have some percentage of surprise pregnancies associated with their use. NFP is 99% effective in avoiding pregnancy if a couple follows the rules all of the time. So there are very few surprises if a couple is so motivated. For more information on NFP go to www.ccli.org.
The Church does not teach that a couple should use no method of family planning and let “things take their course.” The Catechism of the Catholic Church states that “For just reasons, spouses may wish to space the births of their children. It is their duty to make certain that their desire is not motivated by selfishness but is in accord with the generosity appropriate to responsible parenthood. Moreover, they should conform their behavior to the objective criteria of morality…” (No. 2368). The Church calls married couples to be generous, but teaches that a couple may space their children for just reasons and by using a method that is moral.
Mr. Scheske states that a desire for control over our lives is what drives many of us in our decision making. His point is that if we relinquish control over our lives, we will find that we will find happiness. I would like to add that what is needed is allowing God into our decision-making instead of not making decisions at all. God has made it so that we are co-creators with him when it comes to making babies. God wants us to have a say in the matter, otherwise he would be dropping babies from heaven at His will. Taking into consideration their present situation and circumstances, a couple should come to God in prayer, seeking His guidance and wisdom on whether a pregnancy should be sought or not. And in the end, if a couple chooses NFP, God has the final say.
Sincerely,
Nicole Hahn
Dear Ms. Hahn:
Thank you for your moving feedback. I actually took Mr. Scheske's style to represent, with irony, the all-too-prevalent mentality which is completely ignorant of the nature, benefits and beauty of NFP.
I'm quite familiar with the CCL; my wife and I receive their excellent newsletter. I hope to forge a content partnership with them sometime soon so our viewers can benefit from their wisdom. In the meantime, please feel free to write an article on the subject for posting in our Parenting & Family channel. Your final point in particular needs to be shouted from the mountaintops.
We appreciate your support of Catholic Exchange.
In Christ,
Tom Allen
Editor
Catholic Exchange
Note: Today’s Vocations Channel features an excerpt from Pope John Paul II’s apostolic exhortation Familiaris Consortio which addresses conjugal morality.
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