Dear Catholic Exchange:
After the birth of my 4th child by C-section, I had a tubal ligation. At the time, I didn’t realize that what I was doing was sinful. Now that I do realize it, what must I do?
Thank you,
Beth
Dear Beth,
Peace in Christ! The first thing to do, of course, is seek God's forgiveness. Even though you did not realize the sinfulness of a tubal ligation, and are thus not as culpable, sin still affects us and must be cleansed. Secondly, any sin entails a “temporal punishment,” which “must not be conceived of as a kind of vengeance inflicted by God from without, but following from the very nature of sin” (Catechism, no. 1472). God forgives us and cleanses us, but the temporal effects of sin must be atoned for. For example, if a criminal has a conversion while in jail, he still has to serve his sentence.
The Church does not require a specific penance for a tubal ligation, so we recommend seeking the guidance of your pastor or a good spiritual director.
Regarding sterilization reversals, the Church would not discourage them, but does not strictly require them because of financial hardship and surgery-related risks. Reversals for a man, for example, performed in a hospital can cost up to $10,000. Reversals for men and women, however, are substantially cheaper if performed at the doctor’s office.
If a Catholic couple decides not to have a reversal, confessors have recommended different ways to atone for their already-forgiven wrongdoing. Some have advised practicing NFP, telling the couple that they should embrace the discipline that other couples who use NFP embrace. The marital benefits of NFP go far beyond merely using it to conceive or avoid a pregnancy.
Another option is to consider adoption, foster parenting, and/or helping children in need in their parish, some other local group, or some Catholic apostolate. Couples may also want to consider occasionally helping parents with big families. These recommendations are typically better suited to couples who have had no children, whereas you and your husband gave the gift of life to four.
The foregoing are some examples of what spiritual directors and confessors have been known to advise. They are by no means the only possibilities. Pray, hear the direction of a spiritual director, and follow your conscience. God will surely bless you.
I hope this answers your question. If you have further questions on this or would like more information about Catholics United for the Faith, please contact us at 1-800-MY-FAITH (693-2484). Please keep us in your prayers as we endeavor to “support, defend, and advance the efforts of the teaching Church.”
United in the Faith,
David E. Utsler
Information Specialist
Catholics United for the Faith
827 North Fourth Street
Steubenville, OH 43952
800-MY-FAITH (800-693-2484)
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