This past summer, my wife and I attended a 25 year class reunion with a few friends we have known our entire lives. Even though we all live thousands of miles away from each other now, we share a common past and a common bond.
The reunions occur every five years and our three families have not missed any of them. My wife and I have hosted a small private reunion after the big event for the past three or four reunions. This night was no different. It was almost ten o’clock and we had a little campfire in the back yard.
A lot happens to people over twenty years. Our hair changes to gray or we lose it; we gain weight; we change jobs; we buy and sell houses and cars. We have children. We are all pretty well set with the number of children we have, as we are now all over 40 years old. Grandchildren are on the horizon for some of us.
We have each had difficult things to deal with in the past five years. Bill’s wife decided to quit her job and enter a seminary. Brenda’s husband survived a very difficult heart attack nine months ago. Three years earlier, we had lost our son to cancer.
Somehow, we all felt peace and comfort with each other. All of us had turned to our faith in our hour of need. All of us were digging deeper into our faith than we ever had before.
My wife and I were the only Catholics.
I don’t remember how the conversation got started, but the subject of Jesus having brothers came up. Jim and Bill agreed that Jesus had real brothers.
“Sure he does. Everyone knows that James was his brother. You know, the one who wrote the book of James in the Bible,” said Bill.
“This is interesting,” I said “ I don’t think he did have any brothers. He was an only child.”
“Don’t ask me to explain it,” said Jim. “I just know that I am right. Jesus had brothers. Sisters too, I think.”
“I can’t remember when I ever saw so many beautiful stars,” said one of the wives who decided it was better to change the subject before we all got into a heated debate. We went on to finish our conversations about “remember old Mr. Science Teacher and Mrs. Nasty Neighbor.” But we never discussed and settled the issue.
There was a lot I could have said. Actually, I was prepared to get into a conversation. I knew I was right and I knew I could win.
“Was this brother James the son of Zebedee or the son of Alphaeus? (Matthew 10: 2-3). They are both in the Gospel of St. Matthew. If he was the son of Zebedee or the Son of Alphaeus, how could he have been the real brother of Jesus?”
I was frustrated and a little bit angry. I actually went into our house and got out the Bible. I turned to the Gospel of Matthew and was going to go outside and show them they were wrong. I sat there a few minutes trying to figure out what to do. I must have been there longer than I thought, because my wife came in and asked if I was okay.
“Yes, I’m okay. I don’t know why, but I just see this as a direct assault against our Catholic faith. Everyone knows that the Catholic faith teaches that Mary was always a virgin. If Jesus had brothers, then you would be saying that Mary was not a perpetual virgin and that the Catholics do not know what they are talking about. I don’t like to feel that I am being attacked and being told that I am wrong.”
“I know. I felt it too. Pray before you come out. You will know what to do.”
My wife is very wise. I prayed for a few moments and then brought out a couple of cans of soda. I rejoined my friends around the campfire.
The conversation had already shifted. It turned out that Jim’s job was not that much fun. He had a far more serious time with his heart attack than I could have imagined. Bill’s wife becoming a minister had been a real strain on their marriage. She is gone overnight at seminary five nights a week. My wife and I still can’t get over the grief of losing our son.
Through all of these very tough situations, we all found our comfort in the same place. We all trusted in the Lord and still do. We all, 25 years after high school, have God as our number one priority. We were no different than most teenagers 25 years ago. God was much further down on our lists then.
We all have different opinions and interpretations of the Bible. I know to rely on the teachings of the Catholic Church. I have found that when I have a question, I should find out what the Church teaches. I haven’t been able to prove the Church wrong yet, though I have proved myself wrong many times — just as I could have proved my friends wrong.
Still, my friends believe the most important things, as I was reminded at Mass the following morning.
My friends believe in God, the Father almighty.
They believe he created heaven and earth.
They believe in Jesus Christ, His only Son, our Lord.
They believe he was born of the Virgin Mary..
They believe he suffered under Pontius Pilot, was crucified, died, and was buried.
They believe that he descended to the dead.
They believe that on the third day, he rose again.
They believe he ascended into heaven, and is seated at the right hand of the Father.
They believe he will come again to judge the living and the dead.
They believe in the Holy Spirit.
They believe in the holy catholic (universal) Church.
They believe in the communion of saints.
They believe in the forgiveness of sins.
They believe in the resurrection of the body.
They believe in life everlasting.
Perhaps we are less separated than we think.
Who will separate us from the love of God?” St. Paul asks in Romans 8:35. The things that separate us are important, but not important enough to separate us from God. Maybe at the next reunion God will open their hearts and my mouth at the same time, but in the meantime:
“Who will separate us from the love of Christ? Will tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? Just as it is written, “For your sake we are being put to death all day long; we were considered as sheep to be slaughtered. But in all these things we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”
© Copyright 2003 Catholic Exchange
Greg Wunderle is the father of four and teaches fourth grade PSR at St. Andrew the Apostle Parish in Norton, Ohio. After Greg's youngest son, Anthony, died of leukemia, he and his wife Lori founded Anthony's Angels to help critically-ill children and their families.
