By Christopher Gaul
“So, you want to get married? Congratulations! What an exciting time it is in your lives…”
That’s how Father Charles M. Wible introduces his brand new marriage preparation guide, but then he offers a gentle caution about the next decision, the one about getting married in the church. It’s a much more important decision than the wedding dress or the reception plans, he reminds his readers. It is, after all, the sacrament by which a man and a woman become husband and wife and which “proclaims your belief in God and your desire to let God be a part of your wedding and your married life.”
While the church offers some very fine “marriage” preparation programs, Father Wible, the associate pastor of St. Joseph in Cockeysville, Maryland, a priest who has witnessed his share of nuptials, was getting a bit frustrated by what he saw as the inadequacies of current “wedding” guides.
“I thought a new updated resource was desperately needed,” he said.
And so he did something about it. He put together a comprehensive, well organized, elegant and extremely helpful guide of his own, and called it: I Do and Beyond, Planning the Catholic Wedding Ceremony.
Attractively designed, the guide is easy to read, with lucid, common sense commentary to help guide discussions and planning for a wedding, and provides helpful worksheets.
“Because it is the most important part of your wedding celebration, you need to spend some quality time preparing the wedding service,” Father Wible advises his readers. Preparation involves more than just picking the readings and music, he says. It requires thoughtful and prayerful consideration of choices.
“Each element of the wedding service, each word and gesture, reveals something about you as a couple,” the priest asserts.
He invites couples to ask themselves why it is they want a church wedding. After all, there are easier ways of getting married. A justice of the peace doesn’t ask so many questions or require much, if any, preparation.
Answering this important question, he says, is at least as important as choosing the Scripture readings (which are all updated in the guide) and prayers for the celebration.
Father Wible is convinced that once couples articulate exactly why they want to be married in the Catholic Church, it will help them considerably with all their other preparations.
Father Wible begins his guide with reflections on the sacrament of matrimony, and then walks couples through the nuptial Mass and a ceremony outside of Mass. Then there is a chapter on choosing readings from the Old and New Testaments and the Gospels. There is information on the actual choices couples have for the nuptial Mass and the ceremony outside of Mass, as well as prayers and blessings, the rite itself, and weddings between Catholics and unbaptized persons.
Who should be the readers and others who should participate in your wedding? Father Wible has comfortable answers, as he does for planning such traditional rituals as the entrance procession. He even has some helpful stress relieving thoughts on flowers and photographers.
As helpful as Father Wible’s guide may be, however, the author reminds readers that the priest or deacon who is working with a couple in planning their wedding is still the most important resource. Discuss ideas, questions and concerns with him, he advises.
I Do and Beyond, Planning the Catholic Wedding Ceremony is published by Cathedral Foundation Press, P.O. Box 777, Baltimore, MD 21203. Cost is $5.00 but bulk pricing is available. For more information or to order, call 443-263-0248. Or e-mail pmedinger@catholicreview.org
(This article courtesy of the Catholic Review.)
