Forget Ebola, porn is the real plague consuming our society. It is an epidemic of massive proportions and a growing public health crisis. The vast majority of men admit they regularly look at it: Lawyers, doctors, pastors, priests, husbands, it doesn’t matter. And despite the best efforts or protective parents, every child will be exposed to it sooner or later. As one expert on the issue says, it is not a matter of if, it is a matter of when.
I wish I could say Catholic men were better than the rest of society, but it isn’t true. Catholics, and indeed all Christians, view pornography at essentially the exact same rate as non-Christian men. This is tragic.
I could go on, but we know pornography is a real problem. So what to do about it? We need to kick porn to the curb. Mercilessly. If pornography is present in your life, you need to put a gun to its head and pull the trigger. Stop messing around. Stop tolerating its presence in your life. Get ruthless with it and take action.
Here are ten compelling reasons to kill porn in your life.
1. It hurts real women
A lot of times we get the impression that porn is harmless. We are duped into thinking that the women in porn videos are really enjoying themselves and that they are all performing by choice. Wrong. It’s a lie. Countless porn stars who have left the industry have told stories of physical and emotional abuse, coercion, self-harm, depression, violence, and attempted suicide. They say vehemently that being a porn star was miserable, not fun.
That’s not to mention the millions of women who are illegal trafficked and sold as slaves to feed the porn industry, as well as those are who are sold into prostitution to serve the fantasies of men who want to act out porn videos. Make no mistake, porn harms real life women. And every time you watch a video or look at an image, you are causing untold pain to millions of women and children who deserves to be loved and cherished, not abused and objectified.
2. It kills love
Marriages have been ripped apart by pornography. Some men sneak their porn use. Other men look at it openly. Either way, porn destroys intimacy. Watching pornography sticks a knife deep into the heart of your spouse. It causes her to lose all trust. It tells her she will never be good enough, can never measure up. It makes a mockery of your marriage vows. It plants the seeds of bitterness and resentment. It causes her deep pain, emotional and spiritual. Men, if you have any love in your heart for your wife, stop looking at pornography.
3. It causes you to enjoy sex less
A recent survey revealed that a growing number of men prefer pornography to real sex. Why? Because it’s easier. With the click of a button, you have infinite access to seemingly endless airbrushed women doing things no wife in her right mind would ever do. You don’t even have to worry about giving pleasure to another person—porn is all about you. In comparison, real sex feels like a chore. Many men are even reporting they can no longer become aroused enough to have sex with real women. Basically, it ruins your sex life.
4. It warps your view of women
The absolute fastest way to distort your view of women is to watch pornography. In porn, women are just objects, playthings. They have no emotions, no needs, no soul. They are just instruments of gratification. You simply can’t watch women being abused and objectified in the most horrible ways on screen countless times and expect to have a healthy view of real-life women. It simply isn’t possible. News flash: Women are real human beings with emotional, physical, and spiritual needs. They have a soul that will live forever. They deserve your respect and protection, not lust.
Men, do you really want to view your sisters in Christ as so much fresh meat? Because that’s what will happen if you look at porn. You will not look below the surface and see a woman as made in the image of God. Instead, you will begin to fantasize about her as if she were your plaything. This is wrong. This is evil. And it’s what porn does.
5. It extinguishes God’s grace in your soul
A mortal sin is a sin which destroys God’s love in your soul. It is a sin that is so grave, so heinous that the Holy Trinity flees from it, leaving your soul cold and lifeless and hellbound. You can make all the excuses you want, but looking at pornography is a mortal sin and it charts you on a course to hell. St. Paul makes it clear: Those who tolerate sexual sin in their lives “shall not inherit the kingdom of God” (Gal. 5:19-21). You can either heaven or porn, but not both. Take your pick.
6. It gets worse with time
Porn very quickly becomes an addiction like crack or meth. And the thing about addictions is that they always get worse. Sure, you may start innocently enough, spending just a little too much time looking at an ad featuring scantily clad women. But then you enter a Google search, and then another one. Months go by and things get boring. It takes more and more extreme stuff to get you excited. Soon you are watching things that would have horrified you only a short time ago. And no matter how much you see, it is never enough.
Those child abusers you read about? It’s easy to hate them, but they didn’t start out that way. They started out just like you, thinking they could handle the poison of porn. But they couldn’t, and neither can you. Unchecked, porn will consume your life and leave you an empty lust-filled shell of a human being—or worse yet, behind bars. Is that really what you want?
7. It makes you selfish
This one should be pretty obvious, but when you are spending hours gratifying yourself with obscene images, you begin to become obsessed with yourself. Instead of embracing the sacrifice required by true love, you being to view others as objects designed to serve your needs and wants—just like the fantasy women on the screen. Instead of giving and serving like Christ, you become obsessed with taking and consuming. You become self-centered, angry, abusive without even realizing it. You become a narcissist that uses others instead of loving them.
8. It steals your joy
Porn leaves you guilt ridden and miserable. No matter how much we lie to ourselves, we know deep down that porn is wrong. And every time we look at it, our conscience naturally bothers us. Even if we go to confession about it a few times, the next failure leaves us discouraged and depressed and ready to despair. Soon, the devil tempts us to give up on our spiritual lives altogether. “The struggle isn’t worth it,” he whispers in our ears, “Just throw in the towel.” In short, we become like Adam in the garden, hiding from the presence of God.
This is not how Jesus wants us to live our lives. He redeemed us with his precious blood to bring us peace and joy and abundant life, not fear and shame. If you want a newfound joy in your spiritual life, reject porn.
9. It makes you a slave
Before we were baptized, we were the devils slaves. Ruled by our passions and lusts, we were driven around helplessly like so much cattle. But Christ redeemed us, and when we were baptized, he freed us from this cruel slavery and brought us into the freedom of the sons of God. If you’re baptized, you are dead to sin and alive to God. You share in the freedom of Jesus Christ, and you are “no longer a slave but a son” (Gal. 4:7).
The problem is, when we become addicted to sin, we are willingly entering back into the slavery of the devil. It’s like the son of a royal king going down to the slave market and offering himself for sale. It’s insanity. Embrace your freedom as a child of God, and throw off the yoke of the devil’s slavery. Kick porn to the cub.
Get Violent
Jesus was gentle with everyone and everything—except sin. When it came to sin, Jesus took no prisoners. His advice? Pluck it out. Cut it off. No one coasts into heaven, he tells us, but rather “men of violence take it by force” (Matt. 11:12). Are you violent with sin in your life? You should be. People who have cancer don’t tolerate it. People with leprosy don’t tolerate it. People with ebola don’t tolerate it. So why on earth do you tolerate sin?
Men, if you are addicted to porn, don’t put up with it any longer. Take it down. Beat it mercilessly. Show it who’s boss. Fight it as if your life depended on it, because in so many ways, it really does.
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Resources:
Reclaim Sexual Health Addiction Recovery Program (Catholic)
Fortify Recovery Program (Secular)
A Battle Plan For Fighting Porn
K9 Web Filter (Free)
Covenant Eyes Internet Filter (Paid)
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