Recovering from Insanity

While the media beamed its approval, DeGeneres and Heche were the toast of Tinseltown, with job offers pouring in. Some labeled the posh pair “the family of the future,” as they pondered the routine decisions made by other couples – where to live, where to shop, what to wear to the Oscar bash. How sweet. How wholesome. How Hollywood.

Turns out the twosome’s “relationship” was a little more complicated than the media let on. For her part, Heche now claims she was, in her words, “insane” during her three-year co-habitation with Miss DeGeneres, only regaining her sanity about a year ago after being found wandering in Fresno in a confused and stupefied state.

Well, Heche has resurfaced again – this time as a blushing bride. Last week, she was married in Los Angeles – by a minister, no less – to Coleman Laffoon, a cameraman she met while working on a documentary about DeGeneres. Of her new life, Heche says, “I’m all here… I could not be more elated with my life.”

Sounds like somebody owes Gary Bauer an apology.

Bauer’s Family Research Council, you’ll recall, was pilloried in the press a couple of years ago when it took out full page ads in major newspapers featuring groups of “ex-gays” proclaiming to homosexuals that they too could change their destructive lifestyle. Immediately, the FRC was denounced as intolerant, blamed for “creating a climate of hate,” and implicated in the death of Matthew Shepard, a homosexual brutalized by two Wyoming cretins. All this for simply stating the obvious: if some had abandoned homosexuality, others could also.

Of course, the real reason the ad campaign kicked up a storm was that it contradicted modern leftist dogma. It’s become an article of the progressive faith that homosexuals are “born that way,” and therefore can’t change or even be expected to control their proclivities and appetites. Thus, in the world of the open-minded, anyone daring to diverge from their latest doctrine is labeled – guess what? – intolerant! Witness the FRC.

Unfortunately, facts can be awfully inconvenient sometimes. Life turns out to be a lot more complex than our utopian friends make it out to be. Time and again, reality is folded, spindled, and mutilated to fit into politically correct boxes. And just as often, the Latest Thinking turns sour when actual events intrude, like curdled milk left too long in the sun.

The truth is that anyone who doesn’t believe in fallen human nature – and that includes most “progressive” thinkers – is going to be wrong a lot more often than right. Original Sin is still unexcelled in explanatory power.

Heche’s recovery from “insanity” and newly found conjugal bliss is another profound embarrassment to the Big Lie propagated by liberals and their compliant accomplices in the mainstream media. So far, though, it seems they haven’t caught on. But you can’t help feeling that eventually Hollywood will extract revenge for being made a fool. We may read one day of the critic who pierces Miss Heche with the cruelest of blows: “She was a fine actress – until she turned straight.”

(Copyright 2001 Catholic Exchange)

Subscribe to CE
(It's free)

Go to Catholic Exchange homepage