At The Store Then: “Stay by my side. Stay where you can see me! Don’t you dare leave this aisle! Hold my hand in this store! Get out from under that clothes rack — that is NOT funny! You scared Mommy to death!”
At The Store Now: “Stop stepping on my heels! What are you, my shadow? Feel free to go wander around and look at stuff. I’ll text you when I’m ready to go.”
School Mornings Then: “I hear the bus, hurry! Get away from the curb! Do you have your lunch? Homework? Gym clothes? Quick! Run back to the house and get them. Hurry Hurry Hurry!”
School Mornings Now: “Drive carefully. No loud music. No texting while driving! Watch your speed. Do you have your keys? Sunglasses? Wallet? Phone? Quick! Run back to the house and get them. Hurry Hurry Hurry!”
Halloween Then: “Can we get our pumpkins now, can we huh huh huh?”
“It’s October 1st!”
Halloween Now: “Want to pick out pumpkins tonight?”
“Nah. I don’t wanna get one this year.”
Christmas List Then: “And a super monster Lego set, Thomas the Tank Engine trains, a dumptruck, cap gun, Brio pirate set, and some Hank The Cowdog books on tape.”
Christmas List Now: “Uhhhhh, lemme think about it. Grocery money?”
Birthday List Then: “And then for my American Girl Doll, I want a pony, riding outfit, hair brush and rollers, sleeping bag, winter coat, and story books.”
Birthday List Now: “And a saddle pad, leather halter with an engraved name plate, new riding breeches, helmet, jacket, a winter stall blanket plus a turnout blanket, and a huge bag of horse treats.”
Pets Then: “Pa leeeeeeeeeeeeze! Can we get a puppy? We swear we’ll feed him and bathe him and walk him and pick up the poop. And we’ll teach him cool tricks and he can be our guard dog when daddy’s out of town. Pa leeeeeeeeze?”
Pets Now: “It’s your turn, jerk. I fed him last time.”
Clothes Shopping Then: “What do you think of this? Here, try on this dress. You need this. Wait, I’ll come in the dressing room with you and put everything back on their hangers.”
Clothes Shopping Now: “Here’s my Visa. Be home in 3 hours.”
Bathroom Cleaning then: “And that is how we scrub a toilet! Now you try! Good job!”
Bathroom Cleaning Now: “Yeah well don’t come running to me when the health department shows up and condemns this place.”
Homework Then: “Okay Sweetie, how do you spell, enunciate? What’s the capitol of Nebraska?”
Homework Now: “Ouch Sweetie, stop talking! You’re hurting my brain!”
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