Searching through the cemetery today was like looking for a needle in a haystack. There were no headstones — only plaques on the ground. It was a painstaking process to brush the leaves off of each stone so that we could read the names, searching for one that might be familiar. We only looked through one section. Amazingly, we actually did find my husband’s great-grandparents. He was so excited to find the burial place of these people he had never met! He took a picture of our children next to the stone.

This search for our ancestors only leaves me wanting to know more. We have pages and pages of information — names and dates and places of birth for people going back to the 1600s, yet that is all we know. It is amazing to think that if any one of these people wasn’t in this listing, my husband and I and our children would not be here. It took that particular combination of genes and parental influence to create each one of us. Good or bad, these people have contributed to who we are. They each played a part in God’s plan. Yet, we know so little. They lived and breathed and worked and loved and raised their children. Their lives mattered, yet their stories are lost forever.

Walking through cemeteries also always reminds me of my own impending death. This week’s Gospel (Mark 13:24-32) speaks of the end of time: “But of that day or hour, no one knows, neither the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.” The same holds true for our own personal deaths. None of us knows the day or hour that will be our last. Tomorrow is never guaranteed. All we have is today to make the most of. How we choose to use that gift of time is of vital importance.

As I wiped the leaves off of those grave markers today, I knew that many of those people had not been thought of in years. They had long since gone to their eternal destinations. I offered up a silent prayer for their souls. I know that one hundred years from now, I, too, will have been forgotten. To this world, I will be just a name and dates on a gravestone. Yet, like those that came before me, I, too, am part of God’s plan, made to know, love, and serve Him. I pray to fulfill that role well and to make the most of the time that He has given me.

Everyone has something that gets their inner fires burning, and thankfully, these things generally coincide with gifts that have been bestowed upon them from God. The combination of our talents and our passions is the fuel which keeps us going in life. It is the impetus for civilization and relationships and contributions to society. The women whom I am lucky to call friends are all passionate people, yet when we got to the question “Describe a passion you have, for example, a desire to achieve some goal or work on a particular project which gives you lots of energy. What can you do to develop this passion?” the room became eerily silent. We are all mothers, and homeschooling mothers at that. There are so many things we would like to do, some desires admittedly more noble than others, yet they are squashed by a lack of time. There is only so much “emotional energy” that one can muster after a full day of parenting. Even when the energy is there, the time and opportunity are not.

It is true – we mothers do have ample opportunity to practice things like love, patience, kindness, generosity, and self-control. Motherhood is a noble pursuit. I know some women who were truly made to be mothers. I, however, am not one of them. I love my children with all my heart and do all I can for them. They were given to me by God and I treasure the gift and acknowledge the responsibility. I was called to homeschool, despite my initial reluctance. It was definitely the right decision for our family. I’m trying to be the very best mom I can be. I know that I am lucky to have this opportunity. Yet, I am more than that. I am more than the person who takes care of the kids and cleans the house (and I admit, I don’t do that chore particularly well). God gave me other gifts. I was also blessed with the opportunity to obtain an advanced education.

Like my friends, I do try to make use of my passions and talents to contribute to the world at large. It is always in small doses, however. I’ve had older mothers assure me that the day will come when I will get the opportunity to make more use of my gifts. That may be true, or it may not. There is no guarantee that I will live to see that day. Even if I do, there may very well be other people who will need my time and attention – sick parents or caring for grandchildren, for example. The future is a great unknown. All I have is today and the circumstances I find myself in. The unfulfilled desires are frustrating. I sometimes wonder why God made me, what my purpose is in the big scheme of things. I have to trust that he knows better than I do my reason for being here. All I can do is keep going, praying and trying to do the best I can with the time I have. Another wise woman at Bible Study (I told you I was lucky to be among these women!) reminded us all of the importance of acceptance. I need to work on that. I need to be happy where I am and let God take care of the restlessness in my heart.

This week’s Gospel is one of many illustrations of Jesus’ power to heal. These miracle stories usually share some common elements. The person approaches Jesus with firm conviction that Jesus can fix whatever it is that ails him or her. Jesus then performs this service, healing not only the body but also the soul. Lastly, Jesus comments on the person’s faith. It is the faith that saves the person. The person believes.

I am reminded of Jesus’ words to Thomas in the Gospel of John “You believe because you can see me. Blessed are those who have not seen and yet believe.” (John 20:29) Obviously, those of us who practice our Christian faith 2000 years after Jesus walked the Earth fall into the second category, but believing without physical proof is not always easy. I’ve heard it said that faith is a gift given from God. That may be true. Perhaps some are given a greater capacity for faith than others. I think that all are capable of some measure of faith, however. God would not have created a person and made him or her incapable of believing in God. That doesn’t make sense, especially in light of the fact that our main purpose for being is to know, love, and serve God. Therefore, it has to be possible to intellectually choose to have faith, to believe even when one doesn’t have the feeling of belief. St. Therese did this in her last days. She doubted there was a heaven. Yet, she still chose to believe. Blessed Teresa of Calcutta did this as well. She had no consolation from prayer, yet she continued to do it and continued to believe in her mission from Christ.

I have heard so many takes on this Gospel. We all have blindness in our lives that needs to be removed. We are blind to the beauty of the world around us. We go through life with blinders on - looking, but not really appreciating the magnificent creation around us. We are blind to the needs of others. We focus on our own needs and wants and somehow miss how we can help those who share our lives who are in pain. We are blind to our own faults. We choose to overlook the shortcomings in ourselves, but are quick to point out the failings in others. Oh yes, we are all blind in some ways.

Sometimes, however, I think that our greatest blindness is our failure to see God in our everyday lives. A spiritual director that I once had used to ask me “Where was God for you today?” It is such an important question, and one that we often overlook. We get so busy in the minutia of life, in the chores and the work and the responsibility, that we fail to notice God amidst the rhythm of daily life. Then, when the world comes crashing down around us, we wonder “Where is God?” God is there all the time, in both the good and the bad, but we need to open our eyes and quiet our hearts to see. We need to choose to believe even when we don’t feel like it.

Dear Lord, please help me in my blindness. Help me to see you in each and every day, and to acknowledge your presence in my life. Lord, I believe. Please help my unbelief.

Rather, whoever wishes to be great among you will be your servant;
whoever wishes to be first among you will be the slave of all. Excerpt from Mk 10:35-45

I think that all of us can see ourselves in James and John in this Gospel. It is only normal to want to be chosen for the place of honor. We want to be acknowledged. How many of us have waved our hands and yelled (or at least thought) “Pick me! Pick me!” at some point in our lives? I’ve been there more times than, in light of this Gospel, I care to admit.

The Bible Study group I belong to is currently making its way through Growing in the Virtues of Jesus by Quentin Hakenewerth, SM. The very beginning of the book invites the reader to develop one’s true self and set aside one’s ego self. According to Hakenewerth, the ego is the part of us that believes we are the source of our own worth. “When we live out of our ego, we feel worthwhile only to the degree that we can attribute to ourselves — or get others to attribute to us — some achievement, merit, or credit.” Our ego is always searching for the next vote of approval. Hakenewerth shares a story of a religious sister who encountered a four-year-old girl at a Family Renewal conference. The sister asked the little girl what she had learned that day. “Oh, we learned about the old self and the new self,” the little girl responded. “When I am selfish, that’s my old self. And when I love others, that’s my new self.” The little girl had it all figured out.

This is the message of today’s Gospel. To follow Christ we must be the one who serves. We must put our own ego aside. We must stop looking for the accolades and the approval of the world. Rather, we must find our worth in the only One who matters. Our worth comes from God from the very moment of our conception. He made us. That is the source of our value. Instead of seeking the praise of the world and longing to be put on a pedestal, we need to seek to serve, to be “the slave of all.”

Of course, as with so many things in following Christ, knowing it does not make it easy to do. Our ego will continue to rear its head until the day we die, but we can take steps to move in the correct direction. We can take advantage of opportunities to put others first. Those opportunities abound in everyone’s life. We need only make the right choice. Instead of yelling “Pick me!” we can demonstrate “I choose to serve.”

Teresa writes, “I began to think of the soul as if it were a castle . . . in which there are many rooms, just as in Heaven there are many mansions. . . The door of entry into this castle is prayer and meditation.

It is important to note that while St. Teresa’s words were originally intended for those living a consecrated religious life, her teachings have meaning for each of us. Few of us will ever reach the summits of union with God that Teresa experienced. Those of us who live in the world are called to a different way of life and have different obligations. Yet, all of us are invited into a deep relationship with God. Our entire reason for being is to know, love, and serve God. Everything else: our relationships with others, the work of our hands, and the mark we leave on the world, flows from that. Prayer is the key to that relationship with God.

St. Teresa shares what she had been told by a very learned man – “Souls without prayer are like people whose bodies or limbs are paralyzed: they possess feet and hands but they cannot control them.” Without God’s assistance, we are truly powerless. St. Teresa offers great encouragement to the person beginning to pray in earnest. “All that the beginner in prayer has to do . . . is to labor and be resolute and prepare himself with all possible diligence to bring his will into conformity with the will of God.” She also knows that there will be times when we fail in our efforts. “If, then, you sometimes fall, do not lose heart, or cease striving to make progress, for even out of your fall God will bring good. . . .Provided we do not abandon our prayer, the Lord will turn everything we do to our profit.” However, it is important to acknowledge that we can never deserve anything from God. We can never earn His favor. All of His gifts are freely given. We need to love God without any selfish motives. We should not desire to receive consolations in prayer. Yet, “where there is true humility, even if God never grants the soul favors, He will give it peace and resignation to his will.

She also offers encouragement to those of us who get distracted while praying. “Do not imagine that the important thing is never to be thinking of anything else and that if your mind becomes slightly distracted all is lost.” It is still important to struggle through and keep praying. It is only through such dedication that God will give us “the strength which fits us for service. . . The Lord leads each of us as He sees we have need.”

As we celebrate St. Teresa’s feast day, let us reflect on the way she pointed us to God, and invited us into deeper communion with Him. Through her teachings on prayer, she helps instruct us on how to progress in the spiritual life.

The rosary has had a long history and gone through many stages of development. The use of prayer beads actually precedes the time of Christ. Hindus used them to help keep track of prayers said throughout the day. In the Christian tradition, early monastic orders would pray the 150 psalms daily. At first they would use 150 pebbles in a small pouch in order to keep track. This later developed into a string with 150 knots and finally a rope with 150 wooden beads. Members of the laity who did not necessarily know the psalms by heart wanted to have a comparable version of this practice and so the tradition of praying 150 “Our Fathers” each day was born. A similar string of beads was used to keep track of this as well. In time, the “angelic salutation” of Gabriel was added before each “Our Father”: “Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with you.” Later on, Elizabeth’s greeting was added to this: “Blessed are you among women.” Still later, the prayer of “Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death” was added and the “Hail Mary” as we know it was developed.

Meanwhile, in the year 1214, Mary appeared to St. Dominic and encouraged him to spread devotion to the rosary. She promised him that if he did so, he would be successful in converting the Albigensians and that his religious order that he founded would prosper. He spent the rest of his life encouraging others to pray the Rosary and founded a Rosary Confraternity to aid in this task. One hundred years later, Blessed Alan de la Roche picked up where Dominic’s work had ended. He divided the rosary into 10 “Hail Mary” decades preceded by the “Our Father.” In the 15th century, the mysteries of the rosary were assigned to each of the decades. This gave people an opportunity to reflect on Scripture while offering up this meditative prayer. In 1917, Our Lady appeared to three young shepherd children in Fatima, Portugal. She declared herself to be “Our Lady of the Rosary” and repeatedly urged the children to recite the rosary daily.

In more recent times, Pope John XXIII taught that the Rosary must have a threefold purpose: “mystical contemplation, intimate reflection, and pious intention.” On October 16, 2002, Pope John Paul II added a new set of five mysteries to the rosary. Known as the “Luminous Mysteries” or “The Mysteries of Light,” they focus on Jesus’ public ministry. In his apostolic letter “The Rosary of the Virgin Mary”, he wrote that “The rosary, though clearly Marian in character, is at a heart a Christ-centered prayer. It has all the depth of the gospel message in its entirety. It is an echo of the prayer of Mary, her perennial Magnificat for the work of the redemptive Incarnation which began in her virginal womb.”

In our current culture, children are brought forth for Baptism at an early age. My own children were both less than two months old. Yes, I made that commitment for them. I promised to raise them as a Catholics and to teach them the faith. My older son now receives Communion and goes to Reconciliation regularly. He was excited to have the opportunity to do so. My younger son will be receiving those sacraments this year and is also very excited. I hold out hope that when the time comes for them to make their Confirmation, they will be ready to make that personal commitment to the faith.

I truly believe that part of the issue surrounding Confirmation is the age at which it is conferred. In the United States, the Bishops have the discretion to administer the sacrament anywhere between the age of seven and seventeen (obviously, adults can also receive the sacrament). In my own Diocese, the tradition has long been to confer Confirmation during the Junior year of High School when a young person is sixteen or seventeen. The thinking is that a young person is nearly grown and capable of making an adult commitment. A person can also receive a driver’s license at that age, thereby allowing them to take personal responsibility for mass attendance. A young person should have been in Catholic School or attended religious education for a number of years by this time and understand the faith.

The logic is good. The reality, however, is that the majority of young people of that age are in an all out authority rebellion. It is part of the natural process of things. Young people are attempting to spread their wings and figure out what they stand for. It is a time of questioning and searching. These same young people, however, might have been very ready and willing to make that commitment to the faith at a younger age. Such a commitment would have allowed them to receive the added help of the Holy Spirit, help that could be quite beneficial as a young person navigates the challenging teen years.

The Catechism of the Catholic Church states that “every baptized person not yet confirmed can and should receive the sacrament of Confirmation. . . .Although Confirmation is sometimes called the ‘sacrament of Christian maturity,’ we must not confuse adult faith with the adult age of natural growth, nor forget that the baptismal grace is a grace of free, unmerited election and does not need ‘ratification’ to become effective. St. Thomas reminds us of this: ‘Age of body does not determine age of soul’” (CCC 1306,1308).

The Catechism goes on to state that “catechesis for Confirmation should strive to awaken a sense of belonging to the Church of Jesus Christ, the universal Church as well as the parish community” (CCC 1309). Children who have reached the age of reason and have been brought up in the faith can certainly understand that sense of belonging. Why is our Church denying this opportunity for grace to children who want it and are ready for it? Perhaps if the Church extended the opportunity for Confirmation to these younger children, with the understanding that it would need to be the child that wanted it, the issue of whether or not parents needed to make teenagers receive the sacrament would cease to exist.

The simple reality is that there were simply too many churches for not enough Catholics. One stretch of road in Chicopee featured three different ethnic parishes. One hundred years ago, this was desirable. It can no longer be justified by either economic or pastoral considerations. Bishop McDonnell acknowledges that these closings are difficult. He stated that he realizes that church buildings often serve as “memory boxes” for life’s significant moments. He urged all of us to remember, however, that those memories exist forever in our minds. They are not tied to the physical buildings. He also invited us to remember that Christians are a pilgrim people. Our ancestors traveled here over the past two hundred years and established new faith communities far from their native lands. We now have the challenge of building new faith communities of our own.

All of this prompts the question, what does it mean to be Church, to be the people of God? We are a Christian people who believe in the death and resurrection of Jesus. We believe that we are all brothers and sisters in Christ. We gather around the Eucharistic table and celebrate that reality. It shouldn’t matter who we are sitting next to or what building we are in. We are all one family. This reconfiguration of our parishes is an occasion of grief, but it is also an opportunity to rebuild our community of faith on stronger footing. It is an invitation to create new bonds in our parish families.

The closures were announced at all masses this Sunday. The mood was somber and reflective. In the midst of it all, however, a young child showed the way. It was the memorial acclamation and the choir sang out, “Christ has died, Christ has risen, Christ will come again.” As the music faded, a toddler screamed out “Yeah!” While no doubt his mother immediately tried to quiet him, that child, the future of our Church, proclaimed a great reality. That statement is the hallmark of our faith. To be Church is to gather together with others who share and celebrate our faith. Our Church will continue and thrive. May God bless us during this difficult transition.

Monica had three children: Augustine, Navigius, and Perpetua. She wanted to have them baptized, but Patritius refused. Ultimately, through her prayer and patient example, both Patritius and his mother converted to Christianity. Patritius died one year later. By this time, however, Augustine has been sent to Carthage to continue his studies. Here, he fell into serious sin and became a Manichean. Monica was so disgusted that she banished him from her table, but after having a vision, she changed her mind and welcomed him back. Still desperate, she sought the advice of an unknown bishop who reassured her with the famous statement that “the child of those tears shall never perish.” As a result, she stuck close to Augustine, perhaps a little closer than he liked.

At the age of twenty-nine, Augustine told his mother he was going down to the dock to say goodbye to a friend. He actually took off for Rome where he was planning to teach Rhetoric. Monica was not deterred. She followed him there, only to discover when she arrived that Augustine had gone on to Milan. She followed him there as well. She was a woman who was not going to give up, and her persistence was rewarded. At Milan, she received her heart’s greatest desire and saw Augustine baptized by St. Ambrose after he had fought baptism for seventeen years. Augustine and Monica set out for Africa soon after, but Monica would not make it. She died in Ostia in 387. Her death prompted Augustine to write his “Confessions.”

St. Monica is a role-model for all of us who feel we pray in vain. In a world which cries out for immediate gratification she reminds us of the importance of patience. God does not always answer our prayers in the time frame we hope for. Sometimes, we need to pray and pray and pray for years and trust in God’s timing. St. Monica is the patron saint of alcoholics, married women, abuse victims, and mothers. Her feast day is August 27^th .

Prayer to St. Monica

Exemplary Mother of the great Augustine, you perseveringly pursued your wayward son not with wild threats but with prayerful cries to heaven.

Intercede for all mothers in our day so that they may learn to draw their children to God. Teach them how to remain close to their children, even the prodigal sons and daughters who have sadly gone astray. Amen.

The Transfiguration is an amazing event. The chosen Apostles were given a glimpse of Jesus as the Christ, in all his glory. It is significant that this event takes place immediately after Jesus has explained the cost of discipleship – “If anyone wants to be a follower of mine, let him renounce himself and take up his cross and follow me.” (Mark 8:34) The cross is the way to glory. Christianity offers us a reason for our suffering. Those who preach a Gospel of prosperity are not preaching the Gospel of Jesus. Jesus did not promise that our way in life would be easy if only we believe. He did not promise us money and worldly success. Indeed, He promised the opposite – that believing in Him and following in His path would cost us our very lives – “Anyone who wants to save his life will lose it; but anyone who loses his life for my sake, and for the sake of the gospel, will save it.” What He did promise was to be with us in the midst of the suffering and to reward us in the end. We, too, have the opportunity for glory. We, too, have the opportunity to be transfigured. Jesus has offered us eternal life. We only need to pick up our cross and follow Him to be granted that gift.

The Transfiguration also invites us to recognize the moments of grace and beauty that permeate our lives. The Transfiguration was but a brief moment of time in the midst of a busy day. Work was done both before and after. In that moment, however, the Apostles were given a tremendous gift. We, too, are given gifts of moments of grace, glimpses of the beauty that awaits us in the next world. They may come to us while contemplating creation, or holding a child, or praying before the Blessed Sacrament. While they might not be on the scale of the Transfiguration, they do invite us into the mystery that is greater than what we know here on Earth. These moments are usually all too short, but they can be life-changing. They can assure us of the love of God and offer great consolation. They can sustain us when life gets hard and the cross is heavy.

In the Transfiguration and in those gifts of grace that we experience, Jesus is inviting us to experience and be part of His glory. Will we accept the gift?